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Spirit GuideIt's from my heart's deep desire,
That I truly must inquire.
The questions from my guide,
Through dreams that I design.
Upon a prayer this I do call.
That you travel from heaven's own hall.
Either by feet, by wings, or by paws.
And revive a young spirit that falls.
For I am one that desires to know.
Who it is that can help me learn and grow.
So I may find guidance for pleasure and peace.
To fill the void and pain I find inside me.
CryIt is a sad sight to see a young man wail while entangled in the arms of another.It is pure sadness that is cried out in his uncontrollable sobs. All emotion coming from a heart that has been warped, twisted, abused, and forgotten. His past has happened and is gone, leaving him only harsh memories, emptiness and pain. Things that no one can easily escape from.
Whimpers escape his lips as he feels the pain from what has plagued his mind; Thinking of what could have been. Maybe something more then a friendship, or maybe something even more special then love itself. But now all hope is gone and all that is left is a wounded soul and a broken spirit.
His voice is raspy from crying. "I have always always been there for you." The tears continue to flow while his voice mumbles a grievous monotone sound. " I Would have given you the moon if I could, but you just didn't want. Anything." There is no anger in his voice, only sadness. It is not accusations that he
I HungerI hunger... for warmth.
The warmth of happiness- To feel serene at the end of the day.
The warmth from you- To hug and to hold and to be happy together.
The warmth of a pack- To rest easy as I'm surrounded by people who care.
The warmth of hope- To keep my spirit alive so it can fight the next day.
I hunger... and I'm tired of feeling cold.
My Seven Deadly SinsGluttony:
I've never thought of myself to be very gluttonous. I might be a bit hefty weight wise, but I don't eat and eat and eat and then get sick and eat some more. That's what I think of when someone mentions the deadly sin of Gluttony and so I feel I don't fail in that aspect. However, maybe I need to look at other qualities beside food. Gluttony is taking in too much other than what you need. The most obvious and first thought of being a gluten is eating too much food, but you could also put this under many things. Video games for my example. I play enough video games that it makes me ponder if I'm being Gluttonous. However, video games do not hamper my ability to communicate with friends or family (infact, they can be very good catalysts for enjoying a good night) I do not spend my time 24/7 on video games to where it seriously interferes with work or school. Nor am I 'addicted' to where I MUST play video games or I'm going to kill someone
TwistedYou found me while my life was crumpled into a tight ball.
My worry and stress all twisted and matted together into my pain and dreams.
Then piece by piece, you carefully un-crumpled me.
Slowly and carefully undoing the ball that this world had tightly wound.
And then you gazed in awe.
All the web of scars that was left had shaped a broken beauty.
Then you drew pictures upon my tattered page; wrote whispers of serenity upon those broken lines.
The ink stained over the scars like blood in a cloth; never to be removed.
And then knowing you could do no more for me.
The paper was tenderly folded once more and placed beside your heart.
Yet it still hurt.
Just as life crumpled my life, your folding too was painful.
But you folded with love.
Instead of with hate that life waded into me.
And now, what is to be done?
Now that these feelings are upon themselves once again.
I can feel the edges of the folds curling inward.
As well as the ink sweating as the note burns with yearning to be not besi
Hurting for youMy heart inside is broken,
It fell apart for you.
No more tears inside my eyelids,
For I cried them out for you.
No more voice to mourn my problems,
Because I wept and moaned for you.
My feelings are forever hurting,
Because I see that you are blue.
Even though I gave my everything,
My heart still breaks for you.
Because in this life it's just not fair,
When your happiness alludes you.
My ItemOn the outside you are small and simple, but inside, you can hold some real personal qualities. Size and color varies with taste, but your smooth, orange texture is just right for me. You are with me on the go and lighter than a handful of change, yet weighted down with the memories of the past.
You're a catalyst for fun, as well as a tool of opportunity for good times. You're like the keys to an adventure; one that can be as exciting or as mundane as the user makes it.
You're not biased or judgmental, but equal on every side. Yet, more often times than not, someone feels that the chances are swayed for better or worse.
You're like a best friend. Someone who can get you into some interesting situations, but can also save your butt when you least expect it.
Most importantly, you are a gift from an old friend. Someone who I will never forget may mourn over for all eternity.
My twenty-sided dice.
Learning How To Walk AgainLearning how to live my life without you feels like trying to learn how to walk after a terrible car accident.
You stumble frequently and those first few steps seem to hurt the most. The pain lingers on and on, until you wake up one morning and realize the pain has faded into the thing of the past. But then on those stormy nights, good ole author comes knocking on your door and you're haunted with those drilling aches and pains in your most tender joints.
The next few nights, or walks, are very painful. Stress so strong it's as if you can't compare it to your first step. You cry out as your heart breaks, the sound of cracking as your feet slowly grind back into its original place. You just have to keep walking and endure the fact that he's gone and never coming back.
Every new day, or every step forward, feels very numb. Then suddenly arthritis starts stabbing at your heart. It beats heavily to the awkward rhythm of your stumbling footsteps. I find no solace in what used to bring me jo
I cried again todayI cried again today...
Because the moment I thought was so pleasant,
Turned into the blade the split open my heart-
Causing the pain and emotion to go fleeting,
Until my soul was empty of all feeling.
I cried again today,
Because what memories I thought would fill the void in my heart,
Was actually the catalyst to tear my tears away-
which became trapped into my blankets and pillow,
As they muffled my sobs of pain.
I cried again today,
Because the name that was so wonderful,
Now only makes me feel sorrowful-
And what really feels so horrible,
That I don't think this will ever change.
I cried again today,
Because my prayers of thanks and forgiveness,
Evolved into regrets and repentance-
Then I teared up after this sentence,
"I'm already forgiven yet still lost in my ways."
I cried again today...
Because there was nothing left to do,
After a restless night of feeling blue-
Tossing and turning just thinking about you,
And hoping that my 'this is only a dream' wish would come true.
The Villain (Bye Bye Mr. Nice Guy)I am desperately seeking someone to save me
Wondering where I have been going wrong
The more I allow myself to be walked over
The more I feel like it’s where I belong
Under the tread marks of your rubber soled shoe
My face has been driven in to the mud
You’ve laced my dignity with so much self doubt
What on earth have I gained from being good
I am desperately seeking something to save me
The next line to the poem of my life
Dissecting my past with clinical precision
Using a pen-shaped surgical knife
With a blade that seems to cut deeper and deeper
Each time that I am wounded or I am hurt
But maybe now is the time to put down my pen
And distribute my anger with more than words
I am desperately seeking something to save me
I feel I’m on the cusp of a rebirth
I will take centre stage and leave you in the wings
There is no more time left to rehearse
I have stiffened the sinews, I have summoned the blood
I face my fears and I’ve made a decision
I can be strong, I can
WordsIt’s when I get my thoughts to rhyme
That I can truly start to see
What has been swirling in my mind,
And then I get to set it free.
A turmoil of chaotic calls
Becomes a desperate, pleading choir
Of thousands of tangled words
Awaiting me to help them thrive.
They cry, and weep, and beg like kids,
Won’t let me drown myself in sleep
Until I give them what they need –
A string of rhythm and sense to grip.
I strive and strive to make them speak
And give them a melodic vibe.
Yet their presence is too weak,
I'm losing hope that they'll survive.
But after stumbling time and time
Again to let them slip away
I start to hear their chime.
I start to see them find a way.
So one by one and step by step
I see them coming up to me.
They join to spin a magic web –
My soul’s true epitome.
And that’s the place they shall remain,
In subtle, fearless accord.
I never thought that I could tame
Such mischievous, capricious words.
So now I’m pacing back and forth
DethronedDelicate fingertips were once against my cheek,
as were the smiles that you so affectionately cast towards me.
But then you tossed me into the gaping sea,
and I am no longer a beloved queen to thee.
Sweet Music MelodySweet Music Melody lend a mid-night dance to me
Oh what tender lips are these that lay sweet kisses on my cheeks
Making my bashful heart sing...sing...sing
Sweet Music Melody lend a mid-night song to me
Oh what beautiful notes your voice is to a lover's song
beckoning a drifting soul home sweet home
Sweet Music Melody never let your music end
Play your seductive heart's song again and again
Step by step, song by song, you and I are forever one
She Does Not Love YouDo not hear
Her glorious speech
Pretend to be deaf.
Elude her hair
Dancing in the air
Don’t think about
Those sunny eyes
Knowing your past
With just one look.
Avoid her laugh
A melody of harp
Played by angels.
She’s hurting you
Giving you false
When she reveals
All her evil plan
You will be broken
Thinking about suicide.
Bury the memories
With you by her side
Even if they are
The best times
Of your life.
Winds Of TimeThe cool winds of time change from day to day
Yesterday to soon turns into tomorrow
But today is never twice the same
And in heavenly stars I search, but I have yet to find my way
Still, as time marches on, my soul can find no resting place
In the mist of this violent quake
Of many dimensions of being I lies awake
Until the hours of dark meet a brilliant day break
leaving me to, once again ponder an uncertain fate
Four EverSugar coated, and devoted
To the bright side of life.
Optimistic, and artistic
With a blessed soul and mind.
May God bless you, for breaking through
The darkest side of death.
Keep your smile clear, my precious dear
For it brightens the sky.
Writer's ProblemsThis pen feels,
So right in my hand.
With the ability,
To do what only I can.
Ideas fly from my mind,
In a manner, distraught.
But they stick to my pen,
Writers with their problems,
Ideas with their wings.
But take your imagination,
And shoot down the damn things
StargazingCome with me and stay a while
To marvel at the night sky
For darkness brings forth beauty
That daylight might disguise
Oh how the heavens simply teem
With spritely dancing hues
That paint the blackness up above
In purples, pinks, and blues
And did you know that the stars
Are the best at telling a story
About dancing bears or a mighty hunter
Or a hero's road to glory
And the moon sings me to sleep
With a celestial lullaby
And whispers an offer in my ear
To join him in the sky
But then I fall asleep
And the stars still shine
And the colors still dance
And I'll have nothing but these dreams of mine
These dreams that tempt me
To leave this world behind
For a life amongst the stars
Where there's adventure worth to find
But as much as I'd love to go
I know that I must stay
That's why I need you here with me
'Cause I'm afraid I'll drift away
Christmas PrayerDear God,
Tonight I'm writing to you instead of that old fat guy. Now it may sound weird at first, which as you know that probably suits me perfectly, but this year I would like some new body-parts. I would like a new brain for starters. One that doesn't think as much, because I find myself focusing on the things that make me sad; which makes my good, happy days seem bad. I would also like a new heart. One that doesn't desire complicated things that is next to impossible to achieve, or that desires the comfort from people that do not desire to give that comfort. Both attributes can be very painfully to balance and can really put anyone into a depressive funk. I would also like some new eyes and ears this year. I find my old pair is starting to only perceive the bad in this world and not the good that is still in it. Thank you for all you do. What you have given me is more then I deserve. Yet, if it's not too much trouble to ask. If you don't feel comfortable replacing these body-parts,
Keep in Touch!